Celebrity Beach House Reality TV Show Try’s
To Book Charlie Sheen as “Beach House Guest”
Okay the desperate part has not quite sunk in yet
but if we don;t hear from Charlie Sheen in the next 72 hours
this Reality TV Show could be dead! – Not – but what the hell
a little fake drama is good and since none of the shit on the news
is true anyway I feel a little fudging on the truth may help
get the show off the ground.
Anyway Charlie, Dude if you are just hanging in Malibu
and looking for something to do and you want to be on
a set where “weed is good and we are all medical patients”,
then give a trip to San Diego some thought and come hang in
Mission Beach here at Celebrity Beach House Reality TV Show.
Top 5 Reasons Charlie Sheen Should be on Celebrity Beach House TV
1. The Beach Chicks here in San Diego are SUPER HOT and they do
film a lot of porn down here so you have a “fresh crop” of hot chicks
to hang with. (Way more stoners than coke heads which is also
a real +)
2. Dude You Can Be a Guest Photographer and Shoot Some
Stills and Videos for Our SoCal Beaches Magazine websites
How cool is that and once we are done shooting the cars we can
set up some lesbian shower scenes.
3. We Can Get You Your Medical Marijuana Card – Legal Weed!
Now Charlie if you have experienced guilt, happiness, frustration,
anxiety or an erection lasting more than 4 hours then Dude we can
get you a medical marijuana card and you can legally smoke weed
for free here at the beach pad. (That is huge considering Leif Garret
and Danny Bonaducci were told they have the bring their own stash).
Bong hits and beach cruisers on the boardwalk – there are 8 miles
of boardwalk on Mission Beach and Mission Bay and they don’t
have that in Malibu.
4. I am the BEST Wingman a Man Who Wants to Get Laid
Could Ever Have Ever Ever Ever. – Shit I hate to toot my own
fucking horn but I am that good. Why am I a good wingman?
Mainly because I am so stupid and my jokes are so bad that any
chicks will write me off as a loser and the dude(s) I am with will
score plus the fact I am desperate for sex means that any chick
with a pulse will be treated as Cinderella and hopefully they
will be drunk enough to fall out of their shoes. Anyway what more
do you want in life than a dude who is willing to take one for the
team and “come along for the big win”.
5. No One Will Ever know You Were Here
San Diego beaches in the winter are quiet and mellow so
I won’t have to stuff fake tits in your shirt to keep any
tourists from Wisconsin recognizing you. We run a very
secret operation and have a secret set and a real dump for
a location that NO ONE would EVER SUSPECT as being a
“Celebrity Beach House”. You are SAFE HERE!
With all that being said we are very optomistic that Charlie
Sheen will be reading this blog and then emailing us
or calling our Beach Skype Line (858) 736-9310 –
(This is a paradise GIG that any A List star would jump on!)
Charlie give us a call and we will wash the sheets in the back
bedroom and prepare for a royal orgy with real pornstars and
strippers we would never be able to score in 100 years!
Wow this is some real good reality tv – stay tuned for more!
(my new fake pen name I am using on my Medical Marijuana Card)
* WANTED HOT CHICK WITH A D CUP Who Knows How to Spell
and (Provide Happy Ending Massages for Blog Proofreading as an extra ++ What?)
– if you are reading our letter to Charlie Sheen all we can say is if you
live in San Diego and are HOT and want to meet Charlie call us for a
“personal” interview and when he comes to the beach house we will
make sure you can meet him. **
** We do not know Charlie Sheen nor can we guarantee Charlie Sheen
will show up on our Reality TV Show – all we know is that we are throwing
out a shitload of good MAN BAIT out there (chum) and we figure we have an awesome
chance of getting him on the BEST Reality TV Show that no one has ever heard of.
Any girls who decide to get naked and hang on our set and smoke weed
know our “saying Charlie Sheen is coming on the show” acknowledge this is
just a gag for publicity and the chance of getting laid and feeling important with the chances of really meeting Charlie slim to none.
Celebrity Beach House Reality TV Show
SoCal Beaches Magazine Reality TV Bachelor Pad
Mission Beach San Diego California –
Showcasing the Beach Lifestyle to Hollywood Celebrities